Another young celebrity, Amy Winehouse, 27, has died from addiction. I'm not going to use this blog to abuse her further, believe me, I know that being an addict is abuse enough. If you're not an addict or if you've never been addicted, you've no idea the self-abuse you unleash upon yourself, over and over, every waking moment, knowing what you're doing is wrong. I can assure you, no one on this earth could torture our minds as horribly as we torture our own.
I use to be a binge drinker, so, to be honest, I'm still an alcoholic. I'll never be able to drink again because I can't trust myself to stop. To me, drinking never was about being social, it was about getting drunk. As drunk as I could be, as fast as I could be and forget all the chaos and hell inside my head for that brief amount of time until I would, mercifully, black-out and sleep it off...only to wake up the next morning and begin it all over again. It got old and it got miserable, but it didn't stop me from day after day downing a 5th of whiskey a night and always after the kids were in bed because, in my sick mind, I thought I was protecting them from seeing me drunk. I was a fool. People see things, especially little kids and it's always the things you wish they didn't see. Luckily, that was over 6 years ago, I've been sober since and it'll never happen again.
How do I know this?? Because I have God and He helped me and I have me and between God and myself, there's a lot of power and trust. Amen. RIP Amy.
I'd like to add here that I quit drinking on April 27, 2005. It was a good day.
1Peter 5:8 - Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.
